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*Playing halo 3 riding the warthog*

Stoner 1: "dude i bet this turret is so hot you could cook a steak on it! ha ha!"

Me: "dude its so hot you could cook a cake on it"

we were baked as hell

My most memorable quote while stoned: Dude, I think i can make it.?!!

Right before the cop wrote me the ticket for the red light.

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In need of a J

LMAO........I was taking a hit, ya know one of those really deep hits that can just make your eyes water? anyway, while taking said hit, I was reading this post, and it struck me as freaking funny, I choked on my smoke. So Im laughing and choking and ya know spazzing out all over the place and my Nephew(18) says, "Aunt T? I told you to stop trying to read and smoke at the same time. But NO, no one ever listens to me." SO now Im like gasping for air and I cant see from my eyes watering from both choking and laughing, and Im beating myself on my chest trying not to pass out from lack of oxygen. I finally get some air and gasp out , "True that." I am so very stoned right now. Peace.

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The difference between genius and stupidity is genius has its limits.

"I'll show ye small!"

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FUCK THE GARDA

Its been a while since iv had a memorable smoking experience, but south dakota cannabis leaves alot to be desired.

After smoking about 4-5 bowls on the way to a bigger town, we pull into wal-mart

Me: Dude man, why we stoppin here?

My friend: I need to pick up some rubbers

Me: You know, they oughta make washable condoms, not that id use em, but im sure somebody would.

We all proceed through the door laughing our asses off

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"If our country (USA) does indeed trust in god, why do we not trust his creations?" Anonymous

One night me and my friend got way too baked and went back to my place to chill...

Me: Dude, we just spent the last 2 hours staring at the TV
Friend: You fucking ZOMBIE!

Tokin' with my brother, we started talking. Ten minutes later we got back to the pipe...

Me: Who's turn is it?
Bro: I don't know. Did you hit it?
Me: I think I might have. Did you hit it?
Bro: Yeah, I think I hit it. But then you loaded more. Did you hit it?
Me: Maybe. Because you had the last green hit. We were gonna alternate.
Bro: I don't think I hit it though, so its my hit right?
Me: I'm pretty sure I passed it to you after I hit it. Did you hit it then?
Bro: Uhhh...
Me: Hmm...
Bro: I'll hit it if your not gonna hit it
Me: I already had one bowl. You can go ahead.
Bro: You sure? I'm starting to think I hit it.
Me: I don't even know anymore. Shit.
Bro: *hits it* Dude this is cashed.

Thats pretty close to how that went, me and my bro ALWAYS forget who's turn it is. We never did figure out how that bowl was cashed after what we thought was two hits. Apparently we had passed it a few times before this conversation.

A friend and I were stoned, sitting on the ground outside. Out of nowhere she just starts stacking rocks, and eventually, she creates a whole wrock city. Then she just sitts there for a second and is all like,
"What if this is how we were created?"

&&

"Dude, I feel like I'm in a yellow sopngebob box."

I like to play word games, meaning twisting things around. So, I go over to my boyfriends house to meet his 13 year old for the first time. I burned one on the way.
We go outside and light up the grill and the conversation turns to food. Not an uncommon conversation for a growing young lad.
Chit chat chit chat. Turns out he likes to mix his food together. Chit chat.
Me: So, Chris- do you know what you get when you mix potatoes and corn?
Chris: No, what?
Me: PORN

It just slipped out.
They both laughed,. It was funny at the time.

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RastaVacations.com... Check it out!

This is the most recent with one of my friends that I have known for a long time. We always have messed up convos and if we are with people they dont understand us.

So one of our other friends parents keeps a whole drawer full of weed. So, he will take some once in a while if he doesnt have money. I ask my friend I am with if they know he takes weed from them.
*the peoples names have been changed to protect their identity* LOL

We are in the back seat of my friends car with the friend and some other kid in the front seats. We just smoked 2 blunts and are pretty ripped..

Me: So, does Kevin's parents know we take bud from them?
Joe: They know but they act like we dont know they know.
Me: Oh, so they think they are smart acting like we dont know they have a ton of bud?
Joe: Yeah, exactly they act like we dont know that they know that we take bud from them.
Me: They arent very smart then. If they know why dont they say something to Kevin?
Joe: What are they going to say "Kev, are you stealing weed from us?"
Me: True that would be ackward.
Joe: Yeah so they just act like we dont know that they know that we know about all the bud they have.
*Just look at each other grinning*
Me: That totally makes sense to me.

We start to die laughing and the 2 kids are just like "WTF? you guys make no sense."

It made perfect sense to us..

The only reason we die is because we experted it as an inevitability

-Stewart Gilligan Griffin-

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The only bad thing about weed is when it runs out.

I had to read that like 5 times....:P If I would have been there i definately would have been dieing laughing....

"Joy is revelations that later on make no sense"

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RastaVacations.com... Check it out!

Totally makes sense to me lol.

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Listen up.......I got two words for you.

Smoke more!

my son & his friend was over for the weekend and we were drinking tons of soda for the dry mouth. we wanted something else to drink so we were in the kitchen and I was mixing koolaide and I mixed like 3 different kinds together and set a glass for everyone on the table. they all took a big a drink and I waited to see if they liked the mix.
son: *drains the glass sets it down and looks around* what was that ma?
me: koolaide
son's friend: *takes a big drink sputters, coughs. looks up at us* in the immortal words of Socrates I ask you...."I drank what?"
me: that bad huh?
son: I cant believe you remembered that.
son's friend: remember what?

much laughter followed.

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The difference between genius and stupidity is genius has its limits.