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Hi,
Im in need of some advice/education.
Me and my girl have been together for almost 6 months now, we have a long distance relationship because we live in different countries, which is going great and isnt an issue because we meet and im moving there in a few months.

Now i live in a country where MJ is legal to smoke and i've been raised around it.
My friends smoke(d) and i never had a real problem with it as im open minded about it by nature and i was raised that way.

Now here is the "problem" my GF recently started smoking weed again (she recently told me she did it when she was younger along with other stuff) and been doing it more frequently, she smokes together with her flatmates just for fun and to feel good.
However a few days ago she did it and got sick because of it and told me she probably wont do it again.

Until tonight, She called me and told me she was soooo high, and she smoked because her and her mates were bored, then she goes on how much she loves it and so on.

We have talked about it and honestly i am open minded, i tried it once myself, i liked it at first, it made me happy, but then it turned into a little nightmare as i started to get really cold and couldnt stop shaking, i felt my fingers,hands, arms, body and head become numb and was about to black out, i started to panic about it, i wasnt alone and my friend who introduced me to it comforted me and i felt a bit better, however i kept feeling a bit shaky and panicky until i fell asleep when i woke up i still felt a bit woozy but could function properly and went home to bed.

I might want to add that when i smoked i worked for 10 hours straight without any breaks, and i hadnt eaten much either, plus i had some beers prior to it so i also was a bit drunk.

Anyway back to my GF, i have seen people around me that smoke weed on a daily base and eventually get addicted to something, ive heard weed cant make you physically addicted but you can get mentally addicted to it.
But basicly i've seen those people throw their lives away, they ruined their relationships, their careers, their social lives and just live on welfare getting their fix and do nothing else.

Now i love my GF to death, and she loves me just as much , but i am terrified she might end up the same as those other people, i have explained this to her when she was sober and she assured me that nothing bad is going to happen, and that she won't let herself get addicted to it and that she is well aware of what she is doing.
Yet i am still scared, especially after tonight when she was high and just told me how much she loved the high and weed.

She doesnt smoke everyday (as far as i know) and she currently in Uni and really wants a career and a future together with me.

I will never ask her to stop smoking for me, because i can't do that, it's her life and she should do whatever she wants to do, but i have this worry in my head that when i move closer to her she has become like those other people that i have mentioned, and i dont think i can build a future with someone who doesnt want to work or anything but just smoke.

I hope i have explained my situation a bit and i would really have some advice/education about it.
Not only about my GF but also about my perosnal experiences with weed....i really want to do it again because the initial feeling was great, i havent felt that good in a while, but the part that came after it was just scary and i dont really want that feeling back

Anyway, i hope you guys can help me out a bit, i would love to smoke together with her, because like i said i am open minded about it, and maybe if i get in the same situation as her i might feel alot better and assured about it.
It's just i do not want to lose her for anything, if she wants to smoke it on a daily base i am fine with it as long as she still functions in society like any other person.

I probably know some of the answers, like how good do i know my gf to know that she wont turn out like what i am afraid she would turn out to, i do trust her, and i beleive it when she says she is aware of it all.
It just been in my head for a while and i worry about it and i'd like to easy my mind about it.

This turned out into quite a post, hope you will find the time to read all of it
But to sum it up:
-Will my second time be like my first time?
-And am i too paranoid about my GF smoking it?
-Also, i dont beleive what the goverment says about weed, in my country its legal but the majority of the people still consider it as a slight taboo, i think that its mostly a personal thing, are you easily addicted to stuff or how is your own self awareness and control.
Like i said i know my GF and i trust her, but i just have this thing in my head that weed can change people completly.

Thanks for any replies

Dude, Just smoke a fatty and watch some cartoons... You're too parinoid.
Besides, MJ is the nector of the gods... Go forth young man and burn.


-no need to thank me, You'll get my bill in the mail


Lebowskie

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In need of a J

numbness and dizzyness are possible side effects, especially for inexperienced users...you'd probably get the same effect from smoking tobacco, but the sensations are heightened by the mental and circulatory effects of cannabis...if you try cannabis again, just take one or two hits, and don't hold them in your lungs

there are lots of taboos...getting drunk, nakedness, and talking about religion, politics, or bowel movements...if you're afraid of taboos then you need to find yourself a plain looking librarian, start a career in accountancy, and settle down to a life of quiet desperation

cannabis use is relatively benign, and most potsmokers only use cannabis for a few years and then move on...about 1% of people who try cannabis go on to be long term regular users, which says a lot of the low addictive potential of cannabis (think about the high percentage of people who try coffee or cigarettes and go on to be long term regular users of those drugs)

i've seen people who smoke a lot of weed do very well in life...some people are driven to succeed, and some folks are not...take you for example: you're concerned about your future, and taking early steps to avoid failure...that's good but it depends on your definition of failure...what is a bigger failure to you: having a relationship with someone who smokes pot, or losing a relationship with your girlfriend because of something you are afraid will happen to her in the future based on an non-randomized sample of people you know?

love is a risk worth taking...get out there and travel and have fun with your girlfriend while you're still young enough to screw up and recover


PS: what does this mean?

"i have seen people around me that smoke weed on a daily base and eventually get addicted to something"

are you saying that smoking pot makes you addicted to something else? for most potsmokers, cannabis is the last drug they ever use...for them cannabis is more of a terminus drug than a gateway drug

I can't sit here with a good conscience and say she won't do anything else and ruin her life as it's possible among weak people and i don't know her. Weed isn't a gateway drug and its not addictive. It becomes addictive to people with addictive personalities and some do end up going to things that will ruin their lives. Mostly because weed isn't available instead of waiting they seek an alternate high. You just gotta have faith that she knows what shes talking about. I myself got on cocaine at one time, but i stopped because i wanted better for myself. Weed just helps you relax. and yeah dude the whole experience u had was mostly your own stupidity. you are supposed to eat and stuff, and id bet anything it was the beer that did it on an empty stomach and not the weed

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http://sites.google.com/site/oddsmakerproject/

I feel like as long as you're there for her she won't get into anything too crazy, and if she does and can't respect that you don't want her getting into things other than weed, then maybe she's not right for you. Obviously, this is easier said than done, but it may be for the best if you're thinking long term wise. She should also be keeping in mind that you are open-minded.

Personally, I wouldn't worry too much at the moment. I smoke basically everyday and I've tried one other psychedelic drug before, but I still know what's important and I know my values-- school, work, my future, my family/friends, etc.

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"There are things known and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors." -Jim Morrison

Also, smoking experiences are different for everybody and can eventually change. You may be paranoid the first few times (maybe even more than that). I used to get really paranoid but it eventually passed. Many people who get extremely paranoid sometimes forget that their high is an enhancement, so if they're afraid and freaked out about something, it probably seems worse than it actually is.

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"There are things known and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors." -Jim Morrison

if you have an addictive personality you can absolutely become addicted to pot, just like gamling, shopping etc.
if you smoke for the wrong reasons imo, smoking should be fun, social, relaxing, but ti shouldn't be a persons sole way of coping, and shouldn't be used frequently as an escape from real life problems.
if you're girl has issues like this she'll end up on the wrong path, whether its pot or something else. if a person doesn't have a good head on their shoulders they'll spiral downward and whether or not they change is up to them.

im proud of you for not wanting/expecting her to give up smoking for you...but if you're open minded about it you should realize that there are people who smoke everyday and are still productive members of society.
if you're girl isn't, well she can blame the pot but if it wasn't maryjane occupying her time she'd find something else to procrastinate with.

marijuana is a wonderful addition to our lives, people want to accept that but as soon as something not so wonderful happens they're ready to blame the pot. look for the real source of the problem. talkand be open and honest with your girl about your concerns. you're just trying to look out for her and thats what a great friend/boyfriend should do!
good luck

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(813): I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."