Choices...

Wesley_Pipes

Is it ever right to give up on someone, to stop chasing a love that has virtually no chance of being.... or should you persivere so that your not left wondering "what if..." ?

It's easy to give advice on a subject such as this, but put in this situation yourself can you really say what you would do.... in other words, give an unbiased opinion on the matter, then put yourself in that situation.

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Blitzed

Man.. im kinda in this situation right now.. matter of fact, and im stuck

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Wesley_Pipes

you aint the only one dude.

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Blitzed

Well.. it ended, over me going boating. She was mad cause i got to go and she couldn't, told me if I stepped on the boat our relationship was over. Blah blah some minor details, and it was over.

I dont need to put up with that childish immature behavior its the last thing i need in my life

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Wesley_Pipes

why did she not get to go?

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Psycrow420

I pursued one woman for 13 years *both of us dated on an off a few times and during those 13 years we dated other people but I always loved only her* and when she finally told me she thought she found the man she wanted, I finally gave it up, took about a year to get over her and just as I was going to allow myself to look for someone else, I met my current gf, my future wife, the mother of my future children (yes I'm going to marry her, I even bought the ring already :-D)


I suggest you tell them you're giving up on them and if theres ANY chance for anything, they better take it now, or they'll never have it again.


By the way, the guy that the 13 year girl was dating....turned out to be an ass, he was seeing other girls at the same time...and one of the other girl's husband nearly killed him (karma dude *shakes head*) who do you think she told first thing? Yeah, I told her I gave her plenty of chances and while she played with my heart and strung me along, she never TOOK the chance to have me forever and its her loss, I wasn't mean about it, I just told her as a fact.


So prepare yourself for a life without that person, without loving them in the way you want to love them, be their friend, love them as a friend, but take your HEART out of this relationship and give HER the chance to either have you forever, or not have you at all.


Harder to do than you think, but trust me, you feel a lot lighter and a burden will be lifted if you can get over her and KNOW, that SHE made the choice, not you.


Hope it helps.


As for the boating thing Blitzed, if she said that, chances are she'd use that against you the rest of the relationship (If you go out with the boys we're over. If you buy that bag we're over...etc etc) so thats her loss, she wanted to control you and you wanted to do your thing, if she loved you unconditionally, then she'd have let you go and not worried about you. Once again, her loss, not yours.


ok I'll shut up now

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Do or Do Not, there is no Try hmmm----Yoda

PeacefullyStoned

If you love somebody, set them free... if it is meant to be and they love you too... they will come back, and if not then you don't want to put anymore of your time and your heart into it.
I know that is much easier said then done, I definitely know this... but time does heal all pain... so yes it will be extremely difficult, but you will heal. It is also better then always wondering, and always waiting for something that might not be yours.
AND.... she might come back to you. Everybody needs space and time away to figure out what they really want. To clear their heads of all else, and figure out exactly what is going to make them happy.
So again, if you love somebody set them free. Let them find their happiness so you can find yours.

I hope that helped

Peace and Pot.

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MissChnandlerBong

well said my friend well said.

In my opinion you should just be straight up with the girl. Tell her exactly how you feel and if she feels the same way about you.. well then you guys can finally be together.. if not.. then at least you tried. There should be no feelings of "what if" and you can finally move on and let go of her. I don't believe that there is ONE person for everyone. I believe that there are certain types of people who are better suited for each other, but as long as you are genuinely in love and are willing to work at a relationship it will work out.

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Wesley_Pipes

the story is we're on other sides of the world, so yeah it is easier said than done....

and i can't get closure until i see her in person again, even if it's just for 10 minutes....
things are complicated but i feel i can't move on until i know for sure...

maybe it IS a waste of my time, but it's my time to waste and this won't just go away!

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DGC1982

Great responses people, nothing much more to say but I hope you get the girl.

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