Stoner Forums - A Marijuana & 420 Friendly Community

(802): my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???

my favorite so far.

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(813): I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."

"And she said i drew a line of cum on her forehead when i finished and said, "simbaaa""
BAAHHAHAHAHAHAHA
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(913): You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory

(913): Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!

(913): i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
(816): i think im in thre room next to you

(910): so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.

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(513): I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
(937): Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!

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"Legalize It"-Bob Marley

LMAO! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA! YES!!!!!!!

(559): Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.



Okay, so all Mcgyver's out there.... how could this work? I'm fucking curious!!

don't worry my sweet little thread, me and maz wont let you die, will we maz?


(740): so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could

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(813): I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."

(775): I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.

(270): Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?

(204): Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.

I've been addicted to this for a few weeks lol. These are pulled from page 420 ^.^


(626): What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
(1-626): You have mice?
(626): no why?

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(978): Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this

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(205): I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?


LAWL - the hilarity never stops. It's now one of my stoner goals to be on this site. 586 area code - represent! LOL I'm stoned, gonna go play System Shock 2 now.

Not fro page 420, but one of my favs

(917): so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
(1-917): you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth

Also, searching things such as 'weed', 'drugs', 'high', etc will always yield the LOLz

(412): I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.

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(201): I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
(908): I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
(201): Tie

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(403): found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.

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(407): i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?

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(503): i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
(1-503): I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning

(305): i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.


(215): her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.

(858): Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.

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(813): I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."

(757): I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"

(757): he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.

(757): if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am

(901): great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.

(901): i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."

(901): I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.

(901): Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis

(901): All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.

(401): she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
(804): not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote

(804): just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos

(804): girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe

(703): i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
(804): Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
(703): well there you go. the average party**** evolved into megaparty**** just like scientists predicted.

(540): i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
(804): a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
(804): That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit

(804): I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least

(804): Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?

(804): So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.

(804): Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
(1-804): wow, that really makes you stop and think.

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When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace

ROFL

(630): Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.


(805): just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.

(865): is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?

(650): Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.

(225): i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels

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(813): I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."